z's first pumpkin patch

the day after z's birthday was a very busy one!

for whatever reason, z woke up at 5am. mommy was on duty again because daddy was sick with the cold mommy caught from her students & gave to both him & z. we had a bunch of showings that day, along with an open house, so we had to have everything perfectly picked up and clean after z's party. mommy did a lot of it the previous night, but some things she was just too tired to do then. she moved the cars out of the garage, while z was in his crib, and then brought out one of his new birthday toys to play with while mommy vacuumed & swept the garage. fun times. we had to be out of the house early - the first showing was at 9am, so we went to g'ma & g'pa tigard's house early, after picking up some caffeine for mommy & daddy, so that z could take his first 9am nap there. once z woke up, we drove to g'ma & g'pa canby's house & fed him some lunch. neither set of grandparents was home! after that, we headed over to a local pumpkin patch. after that, mommy & daddy got some lunch at the canby burgerville, before driving home, while z fell asleep in the car. we got home, only to find out that we needed to get out of the house again so a couple could see the house AGAIN at 6pm. while mommy straightened up the house, z & daddy headed out to a playground, and mommy picked them up to get some dinner at the mcmenamins pub. we finally got to go back home after that - yay! what a long long day!

z & daddy in front of the farm store.

z is practicing his walking skills.

z & daddy on the pumpkin train.

the front of the pumpkin train.

yay! this train thing is so much fun!

our conductor on the train...

wohoo! this thing is fast!

scary stage coach...

DEAD END!!!!

on the way to the pumpkin patch, we stopped to look at the animals. z wasn't so interested... he kept wanting to touch yucky stuff on the ground, which made mommy nervous. z & rabbits.

z and a goat.

z did express interest in the chickens & ran after the poor things...

z & mommy & lots of pumpkins

i love this pumpkin patch!

i'm tired of this pumpkin patch!

maybe it's not so bad...

daddy - let me down! i want to climb the haystack pyramid by myself!!!

posing...

ooohh.. this hay stuff feels really interesting!

mommy and the pumpkins...

here's a video of z riding the train. he loved it!

z's 1st birthday

on saturday oct 10, we celebrated z's very first birthday. yahoo! we've made it a whole year!!! mommy & daddy were there with z, along with g'ma & g'pa canby, g'ma & g'pa tigard, and aunt m & uncle j.

z's birthday cake. made by mommy. it was a pumpkin spice cake, for our little pumpkin!

here's a pic of the whole table.

here's z with all of his gifts & loving guests...

here's z & daddy, with aunt m in the background. z is not quite sure what to make of the birthday hat.

first taste of cake.

mmmmm!!!!

the onlookers...

and more onlookers...

all in all, he did a great job of eating. especially the ice cream, considering he had no utensils and had to pick it up with his fingers. everyone kept waiting for it to get messy, but it never really did. and thanks to g'ma tigard, who gave him lots of extra frosting, which perhaps was the reason he woke up at 5am the next morning. thanks.

z & g'ma canby

z pulling uncle j's nose. see? kids are so much fun!!!

thanks so much, everyone, for helping us celebrate our pumpkin's first birthday. we love you lots! you made it really special.

HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY ZANE!!!

today is z's very first birthday. yay! we've survived a whole year, and the baby is still alive. here are some pics from his very first day in the real world...

fresh out of mommy!

taking a nap with daddy. he never ever slept with us again. don't know why. it's sad. he just doesn't like sleeping with people.

truly a tank. that's our mothra!

the whole family. his lips are so red in this picture!

mommyhood eve

this is what i looked like this time exactly one year ago. the day before my baby was born. i experienced all sorts of emotions that day. lots of excitement, but lots of fear. on one hand, it was relieving to know exactly when i was going to become a mommy - no water breaking out in public, no going into labor at an inopportune time, no long drawn out labor - a quick under-an-hour procedure. however, it was also stressful - how much would a c-section hurt? what would the recovery be like? would the incision break open later? would i be able to manage lying on my back for the whole operation (when i was unable to lie on my back pregnant for more than 4 seconds)? would i throw up & choke during the procedure? what if z turned out to be 7 pounds, making the whole operation unnecessary? would the spinal block go smoothly? would i bleed to death?

how could i possibly make the most of the Last Free Day Of My Life? i spent some time crying, mourning the end of my single life, releasing my fears of the procedure & becoming a mommy. i saw a movie (really bad) by myself, to keep myself distracted. i spent time imagining what it would be like to hold my son, to nurse him, to hear his cries.... it seemed so bizarre that one minute i was just a pregnant woman, and 40 min later i'd be a mother. boom- just like that, a mommy! that night i had a lot of anger that i was the one who had to get pregnant & go through with the c-section. why couldn't j do that? why me? why did my body have to get wrecked from expanding so far (really really far in z's case), getting a nice red scar & wrinkled skin where my flat belly used to be, while his gets to remain exactly the same? some women really love being pregnant, love feeling the baby kick, love the full baby belly feeling. that wasn't me. baby growing really really hurt. i liked the concept, but in reality, it was super painful. i've let go of most of that anger. z is such a special little person, and we love him so much! i'm so happy and fortunate to be able to experience parenthood.

eating apple slices.

this stage that z is in is so funny. if i'm eating & he isn't, he wants to eat what i'm eating. he just had to help me eat my bagel this morning, and just had to help me finish eating the apple left from his lunch this afternoon. we went walking to the mailbox, and he had to stop & pick every dandelion he saw (which meant i had to carry him most of the way). everything he picks up off the ground he wants to put in his mouth. he likes grilled zucchini & red pepper, and i don't need to cut it up anymore. he definitely has all four molars poking through, so he puts them to work (sometimes on mama's finger!). he can eat apple slices...

pre-nap weardown

fun in the bathroom

the things we find in the bathroom drawers...

sick.

both z & i are sick. i've been fighting something since last monday, and he just got it. yucky, fierce cold. no fun. j is playing with z while i rest on the sofa, so i thought i'd take the free moment to blog. last weekend we left z with grandma & grandpa tigard, while we flew across the country for a wedding. j's friend from college got married outside of washington d.c. we were lucky to get a straight flight, but the 5+ hours of travel both ways didn't allow for much more than a few extra hours of sleep each night & the wedding itself. we did get to have a nice dinner friday night which was most enjoyable. we really missed the little guy. our realtor was busy showing the house to three different parties, none of which have made an offer. time is running out. lots of people pick up flyers, but that's about it.

our little guy is almost one year old! this time last year, i was having to go to lots of appointments - fetal monitoring, ultrasound, acupuncture... eating no carbs, getting larger & larger each day. wondering about so many things... what would his birth be like? would he be colicky? would i be able to breast feed? would i be able to handle the lack of sleep? i was so worried about so many things. i was excited, too, but i have to admit i was more full of anxiety than joy. it's almost a year later now, and we're all three still alive. it's been a year of wonderful things, not so easy times, but all in all, the positives have definitely outweighed the negatives. z is such a beautiful, happy being. we're honored to have the opportunity to raise him.

some stats... he's still really big. last time i checked, i felt 3 molars coming through. he takes steps by himself every now & then, but not consistently enough to say he's "walking." now he sometimes says "mamama" on command, but isn't quite yet calling either of us mama or dada. he sometimes can wave, but isn't doing any signing yet. for the first time, i didn't finely dice his veggies in the cuisinart, and i think he's doing fine with the chewing.

we're going to have a very low key birthday celebration next saturday. just the grandparents, us, and perhaps aunt m & uncle j (unless the bendites surprise us...???). i feel like j & i deserve a night of partying for surviving the first year, but i fear we'll still be sicky poo next weekend. that, and we did just get a weekend away, which is more than lots of parents get, so i guess we've already celebrated. woohoo! (although we do still have 6 days left to mess things up...)

this whole selling the house thing is frustrating. we had an offer, and made a counteroffer, and then the buying party got cold feet & backed out. so there was an open house today, and our agent said lots and lots of people looked at it. we'll see if it produces any buyers. i'm so sick of cleaning up the house, making it's all aired out & perfectly perfectly clean with no speck of dirt visible. it's so much work.

another friend had a baby this month. i'm losing count, there are so many! it's definitely baby season.

our baby has two more teeth - that makes four on the bottom, four on the top. his lower right molar area seems extra swollen & squishy, so i'm wondering if it will be coming through soon. he's been drooling a lot. we've been giving him ibuprofen at night, as the few times we haven't, he seems to wake up. we were doing an 8pm bedtime, but realized that it wasn't helping at all with his early wake up times, so we've switched him back to a 7-7:30pm bedtime. also trying to reign in his naps. i'd let him sleep 2-3 hours if he was game for it the past month, but i think it was ruining his night sleeping, so i'm limiting him to just 1.5 hours at a time. he'll be switching to just one nap a day at some point, but i don't think he's ready for that. this weekend was pretty busy. friday night we spent cleaning for a 10am showing on sat, after which we were told about the buyers backing out. we spent some of sat afternoon at boedecker cellars, picking up some futures we had purchased way back in the winter, and tasting some great wine. sat evening we met up with g'ma & g'pa tigard, and my cousins s & d for dinner, before getting zane to bed. we watched forgetting sarah marshall - it was a really really funny movie!!!! really quirky & not as predictable as most comedies. today we cleaned the house, napped when z did, and then left the house for the open house. we ran some errands, saw a friend & her new baby in the hospital, and went to another friend's birthday party, before coming home to do laundry & cook for the week. busy weekend. this week will be short - we leave for the east coast for the weekend for a friend's wedding. z will be staying with g'ma & g'pa tigard.

our ferocious tiger.

today, we happened to be in fred meyer, and saw some halloween costumes, so we thought we'd get one while they're all available & while we had the time. there was an open house at home today, so we had to be out of the house for at least 2 hours. daddy tried the costume on to see if it fit. he thought it would be too big, but mommy knew better- it barely fit. we took pictures just in case it no longer fits in a month. here's the front view.

here 's a back view. we love the tail, and the inside out foot (looks a little creepy...)

and the hood up... little z was such a good sport about the whole thing.

laundry

daddy's having fun doing laundry. z is a good sport.

it's all over

our little pumpkin just walked by himself a few minutes ago...

11 months!

z is now 11 months old. i don't know how much he weighs, but most likely above 25 lbs. he likes dancing, and can do so on command. he stood by himself for about 6 seconds twice today, but he's not walking by himself yet.

we all went to the fountains by the beaverton library this afternoon, after running some errands. z was getting tired, but still had fun. he's such a cutie! grandma tigard came over & watched him while daddy & mommy went to see the new quentin tarantino movie "inglorious basterds." it was a good movie, but gory & bloody like all the other tarantino flicks.

yum watermelon!

our son loves watermelon!!!

bike ride

daddy & z are headed out for a bike ride to a playground...

bike helmet

z is never so happy getting his bike helmet on, but once it's on, he's ok. he's so cute with his new shoes!

z & momma lying on the floor. we like rolling around...

orange!

z has new shoes, courtesy of c. they're great, and they're ORANGE!

checking out the ducks at the park

walk to the park

z & j on a walk to the park with the ducks & the lake.

boo-boo

here's a pic of z soon after falling flat on his nose on sunday. i have no idea how it happened. i was sitting very close to him, and for whatever reason, he leaned forward without his hands, ending in the face-plant. his nose bled a little - not gushing or anything, but i took a picture just to keep track of what it looked like in the beginning in case it got really bruised, etc. i called the doctor to find out what to do, and they just said as long as it didn't look broken & the bleeding didn't continue, just give him some tylenol. he soon forgot about it, and it never got bruised. just shook mommy up.

the weekend got a little better - j gave me some time away from z, which is always refreshing. saw my sister n law, & another new mommy on monday. the weekend disappeared quickly, but at least this is a short week!

things with the house buying/selling are getting more complicated - there are other buyers interested now in the house we made the offer for, so it's more important than ever to get our house sold. we're lowering the price again today. lots of stress in this house at the moment.

stupid day.

this was one of those no good horrible very bad days.  i didn't sleep so well last night.  the pumpkin was very fussy today.  he barely slept for his second nap, and woke up screaming.  he usually screams for a few minutes halfway through his naps, before falling back to sleep for a significant time, but not this time.  he wouldn't calm down when i picked him up.  i tried nursing him, but he bit my nipple and wouldn't let go - i had to pull out through his teeth.  i started crying too, and this was 10 min before i had to go teach a lesson.  and then i was so tired after teaching when we were at new seasons doing the grocery shopping - i dropped two of three of my yogurts & they splattered all over the floor & my jeans.  i had to ask a worker to clean it up - i felt like a little kid.  they're always so nice when something like that happens - they don't charge you for it.  i still feel bad about it.  i've broken so many jars of baby food - they're stacked so precariously, and i get really clumsy & jittery with sleep deprivation.  lately i can't tolerate any caffeine - no chocolate, not even decaf coffee.  so i'm constantly tired.  i haven't exercised in such a long time, because it's more important to sleep when i can.  i spent the evening cooking food for j & i, and separate food for z.  i was so so so exhausted when i finally finished that i went straight to bed.  i did some sudoku, & then turned out the light.  i fell asleep for about a half hour, and something woke me up.  and now i've been lying in bed, unable to sleep.  i just got up for a small snack.  i'll try sudoku-ing again.  i hope i can sleep.  i'm so tired.  z must be teething or something - he felt warm to the touch today.  i took his temp once, and it was 100.3 - not an official fever.  but i think he's been extra fussy.  of course part of it was due to his lack of a real afternoon nap - 35 min does not do it.  he didn't make it to his new 8pm bedtime.  j started bedtime early (i was cooking).  by the time friday comes, i don't have any patience left, especially when he bites me... most kids are soothed by nursing.  not mine.  i don't think he "knows" mommy, or at least doesn't prefer me over anyone else.  he never went through the whole attachment thing, and should have by now if he was going to.  on one hand i'm happy, but on the other, it makes me feel like a bad mother.  i guess i shouldn't bother with nursing anymore.  he really doesn't seem to like it.